I get loads of spam on this site in the comments. Thankfully a marvellous WordPress plug-in called Akismet filters it all out, and all I have to do is check the quarantined stuff occasionally in case there’s been a false positive. So far it’s worked perfectly, with no false results.
I’ve noticed recently that some of the spammers, instead of putting meaningless crap in the comment body, have now started putting jokes instead. Which is nice, because it gives me a chuckle when I’m clearing them out. I thought I’d share a few with you…
The strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of one of the older workmen. After several minutes, the older worker had had enough. “Why don’t you put your money where your mouth is,” he said. “I will bet a week’s wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that outbuilding that you won’t be able to wheel back.” “You’re on, old man,” the braggart replied. “Let’s see what you got.” The old man reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. Then, nodding to the young man, he said, “All right. Get in.”
——-
Service Agencies
At one time in my life, I thought I understood the meaning of the word “service.”
The act of doing things for other people.
Then I heard the terms:
Internal Revenue Service
Postal Service
Civil Service
Service Stations
Customer Service
City/County Public Service
And I became confused about the word “service.” This is not what I thought “service” meant.
Then one day, I overheard two farmers talking, and one of them mentioned that he was having a bull service a few of his cows.
WHAM!! It all came into perspective! Now I understand what all those “service” agencies are doing to us.
——-
There are 3 hunters in the woods, they’re all telling each other what they’re
going to shoot. The first one says he’s going to get a buck. So he goes out and
comes back with a buck. Then the other 2 hunters ask how he did it and he says,
‘’I see tracks I follow tracks I get buck’’. So the second hunter says “I’m
going to get a doe.” So he goes out and comes back with a doe. Then the 3rd
hunter asks him how he did it. The 2nd hunter says, ‘’I see tracks I follow
tracks I get doe’’. So the 3rd hunter says, ‘’I’m just going to shoot at
anything I see’’. So he goes out and comes back half a day later all beaten
bruised bloody and totally trashed. And the other two hunters ask what happened
and he says, ‘’I see tracks I follow tracks, I get hit by train!’’
Most of the jokes that come in are pretty dirty, but here’s another one that appeared which is clean and made me laugh:
A blind man was out walking with his seeing eye dog when suddenly the animal paused and wet the man’s leg. Bending down, the blind man stretched out his hand and patted the dog’s head.
Having watched what happened, a passerby said, “sir, why are you patting him? That dog just peed on your leg!”
“I know,” said the blind man, “but i gotta find his head before i can kick his butt.”